I round the corner of my block with Rocky. We're on our after dinner walk. Rocky's on prednisone now which makes him much more thirsty than normal and also much hungrier so he's constantly got his nose to the ground whenever we're outside, snarfling for bits of food.
Rocky catches some scent and sticks his head into the bushes. Too late, I pull him back out and he's already got something in his mouth, chewing. I'm about to go in after it before he can gulp it down but then he crouches back and I think maybe he's just backing up but instead he starts to take a dump.
He's chewing on his new found treat and crapping on the sidewalk and looking up at me and he might as well be saying, "What? I'm multitasking."
From behind me, a little girl and her mom turn the corner. They stop. The little girl goes, "Mommy, lookadoggie."
Oh dear God, I think.
"CanIpethim?" little girl asks.
I can feel mom's eyes focusing in the dark, trying to figure out what's going on. Rocky looks at them. He finishes chewing and gulps and at the same time another large turd drops out of his ass and falls beside the other two turds already deposited on the sidewalk.
"Oh," mom says. "I think we should cross the street." They do so. The little girl looks back at Rocky, disappointed.
I pull out the plastic bags, clean up after my dog, vacate the scene.
Every time you write about Rocky, I think about my lab who passed away two years ago. I think they were kindred spirits. Cody constantly had his nose to the ground when we went for walks and could sniff out the most vile, disgusting garbage on the sidewalk (and he wasn't even on any drugs) and have it scarfed down before I even realized what was going on. At least three or four times a week, I had my fingers down his throat trying to get him to throw up something incredibly gross. You would think I never fed him but believe me I did...besides his own food, he would get at least a few bites of whatever I was eating because I couldn't stand to look at his sorry face.
ReplyDeleteOn walks we would go for blocks and all he would do is pee but, of course, as soon as we came across any people, then he would drop his ass and let loose. I think he just loved having an audience (and humiliating me).
God, I miss the big lug.
The other day when I was walking Gracie (well, when she was dragging me) I looked down just in time to see her snarf up a yummy big wad of gum. DROP IT DROP IT DROP IT
ReplyDelete(unrelatedly, my captcha just now was "kanis")
ReplyDeleteHi Biscuit, I didn't even know there was a word for those annoying are you human tests. Thanks for the schoolin'.
ReplyDeleteIsn't there a children's book called "Everybody Poops"? This incident could have provided real life hands-on experience for the little girl. Another opportunity missed...
ReplyDelete