If you want to know more about me, I've developed a comprehensive training program which studies have shown can improve knowledge about me in 9 out of 10 people, 17 times out of 20. The kit includes a double folded pamphlet about my life, a random object I lightly touched within the last week, a page from a magazine I sort of glanced at quickly, and the residual warmth from my fingers emanating from the envelope I send you. All this for not 7, not 6 but only 5 easy payments of not $79.99, not $69.99 but only $59.99 each - and that includes all taxes and handling and by handling I mean:
1. I put all the valuables into a bubble envelope.
2. I lick the flap and/or remove the removable strip to reveal the sticky stuff underneath.
3. I fold and seal the flap.
4. I get my mum to drop the envelope off into the mailbox.
5. If my mum can't do it because she's too "busy" "cleaning the house" or "cooking" or "doing my laundry" or "running the bath water for me" then I get the kid next door to drop it off but then I have to pay him $5.00 which will cost you $20.00.
6. If the kid next door can't drop it off then I have to drop it off myself which won't cost me anything but which will cost you $45.00 plus a possible surcharge of $10.00 depending on whether or not it's cold out and if I have to wear pants.
7. If I have to deliver the envelope to the mailbox at the corner myself, there may also be an additional $500 charge which is how much I owe the guy across the street for, uh, headache medicine. But that's only if he catches me and he hasn't yet so chances are good you'll save the $500.
8. Yes, you still have to pay for postage. I mean do I look like I'm running a charity here?
Anyway, yeah. That's how it works. Once I get all the cash, I send you the stuff.
Bonus: If you act now, I'll also include some tap water which I will have personally transferred into a plastic bottle. Once you've poured the water out into your own properly consecrated gold chalice, remember to return the plastic bottle to me so I can get a refund on it otherwise there will be an additional $25 charge added to your credit card.
Bonus Plus!: If you really act now, you will automatically get a 5% discount on any item I discard this month. So far that includes an empty bag of ketchup flavoured potato chips (some crumbs at the bottom but now that I see them, I'll probably pour them out into a dish and save them for guests), a bottle of old shampoo, and one sock (because I've spent the last 8 months looking for the matching one but can't find it and the police are absolutely no help). Actually, sorry, I'm going to keep the shampoo, in case the guests ask for hand soap. I do, however, have a bottle of antiseptic hand cleanser which has got at least another couple of squirts left in it if you turn it upside down, shake it and let it dribble out.
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A request
The reason for this blog is to help get specific dogs adopted from TAS but equally important is to try to normalize the idea of shelter dogs being just as good and just as desirable as any other dogs including those which are regularly merchandised by backyard breeders, puppy millers and those few remaining pet store owners who still feel a need to sell live animals. The single greatest stigma shelter animals still face is the belief that shelter animals are substandard animals. Anyone who has had enough experience with shelter animals knows this is untrue but the general public hasn't had the same experiences you've had. They see a nice dog photo in a glossy magazine and too many of them would never think of associating that dog with a dog from a shelter. After all, no one abandons perfectly good dogs, right? Unfortunately, as we all know, perfectly good dogs are abandoned all the time.
The public still too often associates shelter dogs with images of beat up, sick, dirty, severely traumatized animals and while we definitely sometimes see victims such as these, they are certainly not the majority and, regardless, even the most abused animals can very often be saved and made whole again.
Pound Dogs sometimes discusses the sad histories some of the dogs have suffered. For the most part, though, it tries to present the dogs not as victims but as great potential family members. The goal is to raise the profiles of animals in adoption centers so that a potential pet owner sees them as the best choice, not just as the charity choice.
So, here's the favour I'm asking. Whenever you see a dog picture on these pages you think is decent enough, I'd like you to consider sharing it on Facebook or any other social media sites you're using (I know many of you do this already and thank you for that). And when you share it, please mention that the dog in the photo is a shelter dog like so many other shelter dogs waiting for a home. If we can get even five percent of the pet buying public to see shelter dogs differently, to see how beautiful they are and how wonderful they are, and to consider shelter dogs as their first choice for a new family member, we can end the suffering of homeless pets in this country.
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The public still too often associates shelter dogs with images of beat up, sick, dirty, severely traumatized animals and while we definitely sometimes see victims such as these, they are certainly not the majority and, regardless, even the most abused animals can very often be saved and made whole again.
Pound Dogs sometimes discusses the sad histories some of the dogs have suffered. For the most part, though, it tries to present the dogs not as victims but as great potential family members. The goal is to raise the profiles of animals in adoption centers so that a potential pet owner sees them as the best choice, not just as the charity choice.
So, here's the favour I'm asking. Whenever you see a dog picture on these pages you think is decent enough, I'd like you to consider sharing it on Facebook or any other social media sites you're using (I know many of you do this already and thank you for that). And when you share it, please mention that the dog in the photo is a shelter dog like so many other shelter dogs waiting for a home. If we can get even five percent of the pet buying public to see shelter dogs differently, to see how beautiful they are and how wonderful they are, and to consider shelter dogs as their first choice for a new family member, we can end the suffering of homeless pets in this country.
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